Your Suspicions Were Correct: James Corden Is A Dickhead

There was never a shortage of evidence. In fact, prior to this, one didn’t need to look any further beyond The Late Late Show host’s famously disastrous Reddit AMA circa 2019, which offered a rich compendium of Ellen DeGeneres-level assholery. After his recent banning from beloved New York restaurant Balthazar, however, there’s simply no denying it… James Corden is a dickhead.

The latest chapter of this extensive chronicle was inked by the French brasserie’s proprietor, Keith McNally, who enjoys the distinct privilege of being high-profile enough to fight back. Unlike the undoubtedly long list of anonymous local café owners Corden has terrorised, based on the stories that that have long circulated online (a little more on this later).

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“James Corden is a hugely gifted comedian, but a tiny cretin of a man. And the most abusive customer to my Balthazar servers since the restaurant opened 25 years ago,” Keith McNally began in his viral Instagram post.

“I don’t often 86 a customer, to today I 86’d James Corden. It did not make me laugh.

“Here are two examples of the funny man’s treatment of my staff.”

Manager’s Report #1

“In June, James Corden was here on Table 61. (Although this is diabolical, it happens very occasionally in all restaurants.) After eating his main course, Corden showed the hair to Balthazar Manager G, who was very apologetic.”

“Corden was extremely nasty to G, and said: ‘Get us another round of drinks this second. And also take care of all of our drinks so far. This way I [won’t] write any nasty reviews in Yelp or anything like that.'”

Manager’s Report #2

“James Corden was at Balthazar with his wife on October 9th for brunch. He asked for a table outside. Brunch Maitre D Allie Wolters took the party to Table 301.”

“Mr Corden’s wife ordered an egg yolk omelette with gruyere cheese and salad. A few minutes after they received the food, James called their server MK and told her there was a little bit of egg white mixed with the egg yolk. MK informed the Floor Manager G. The kitchen remade the dish, but unfortunately, sent it with home fries instead of salad.”

“That’s when James Corden began yelling like crazy to the server: ‘You can’t do your job! You can’t do your job! Maybe I should go into the kitchen and cook the omelette myself!’ MK was very apologetic and brought G over to the table. He returned the dish, and after that, everything was fine.”

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“He gave them promo champagne glasses to smooth things out. G said that Corden was pleasant to him but nasty to the server. MK was very shaken, but professional that she is, continued to finish her shift.”

This is, of course, by no means the first time James Corden has revealed his true nature. From behind the scenes during his tenure on The Late Late Show to other eateries, there have been several accounts of the alleged comedian being a proper git:

Back in 2020, James Corden revealed he’d sought out therapy to prevent becoming “intoxicated” by fame. But it sounds as though that might have been a grave misdiagnosis. Some people are just raging cunts at their very core, famous or not.

Anyway, here’s a clip of our favourite Gavin & Stacy clip – incidentally, also concerning food – from a time before anyone paid any attention to this transatlantic pestilence. A pestilence that the Yanks will surely be glad to see the back of.

UPDATE [18/10/22]: James Corden’s ban from Balthazar has since been reversed after he “apologised profusely” to Keith McNally.

“Having fucked up myself more than most people, I strongly believe in second chances,” said McNally, once again via Instagram post.

“Anyone magnanimous enough to apologise to a deadbeat layabout like me (and my staff) doesn’t deserve to be banned from anywhere. Especially Balthazar… All is Forgiven.”

Disappointing, but mighty big of old Keith.