Your wingman is a reflection of yourself. They can be similar to you or opposite, but either way, their personality has to complement yours to some degree. They can fill in the gaps where yours lacks, or reinforce yours when two of the same are put together. Regardless, equality is key here.
You may differ in many ways, namely the traits and charisma you have to offer, but you should always aim to balance each other out. The last thing you want is for your newly formed acquaintances to like your wingman more than you. Similarly, if you’re hanging out with someone who comes across as a dick, chances are you’ll come across as one too.
Likewise, don’t choose someone that is a loser and makes you look too good. In fact, women will probably see straight through it, you’ll look over confident and it will backfire.
Choose someone who is on your level.
On the very odd occasion, you might meet a random potential wingman when you’re out for drinks. An automatic rapport kicks off so well between you that the next minute you’re both talking to two prime birds. This is unlikely, though, so you may as well plan it out properly after browsing our guide below. Remember, the title of ‘wingman’ can be as dynamic as the situations you may find yourself in. A wingman can be a close friend, a random, your dog, it can even be a wing woman.
The following made our list when planning our after work drinks and boozy Sunday sessions.
1. They MUST be a quick thinker, a problem solver.
It seems like common sense, but you’d be surprised at how uncommon even that is. Can they think on their feet? Chances are, opportunities will arise from the surroundings you’re already in. This environment might be something very foreign for the both of you, so you need to know your wingman can improvise and adapt to whatever might pop up, be it an opportunity or a hurdle.
2. They need to have patience.
Very rarely do brief encounters end in the outcome you’re looking for in any quick or decisive manner. You and your wingman must be patient. They need to know how to wait patiently – especially if you’re talking to two or more women by yourself – before they join in the conversation. Two guys approaching two girls can come across as a little too full on. Your wingman must know when to be patient, and when to chime in. Timing is key.
3. They know you.
You should both know what each other are thinking without saying two words. This is extremely important in progressing the conversation or knowing when to duck out if there isn’t any potential.
4. They’re a natural.
They need to come across as smooth and nonchalant. If it seems forced, or out of character for either of you, the outcome won’t be a good one. Most importantly, they need to be naturally good at exaggerating and playing things up to make you look good. This is called edifying. They need to be a natural at talking the big game.
5. They shouldn’t oversell you.
It’s great that you’re not talking yourself up, and your mate is doing it for you, but is that really any different? Women can tell straight away if your wingman is your best mate or a complete stranger. If they’re your best mate, chances are they’re keen to help out their boy and know everything that will make you more appealing. Just make sure they don’t overdo it. You may as well have a nametag that reads “they’re saying what I told them to say.”
6. They’re hungry for success.
If your wingman dreams big in everyday life, sets goals, works hard, is self-aware, then these are all going to reverberate in the 60-second introduction or conversation that may help you get over the line. A rejection or a hurdle won’t put them off either, they’ll go hard or go home.
7. They need to be flexible and compromising.
Basically, your wingman needs to be prepared to switch. If the chat isn’t going too well for you but you think there is greater potential with the person your wingman is talking to, your wingman needs to be ready to switch. There’s no room for selfishness in this game.
8. They need that energy.
You know what I’m talking about. We’ve all heard about it, that intangible aura that a select few people have. Let’s be real, chances are not everyone can be that enthusiastic and engaging, but some definitely have it more than others. It doesn’t have to be 120%, but you know if that person adds value to a social situation or drains it. Your wingman needs to be the former.
9. You must tick these boxes yourself.
It’s easy to forget, but you’re just as much their wingman as they are yours. Self-awareness is key.
10. Your wingman can, in fact, be a wing woman.
This is quite possibly the trickiest tactic you could use, but should it work in your favour, it’s an absolute winner. It can go one of two ways.
On one hand, it raises your game ten-fold. When a woman sees a man with another woman or other women it’s a subconscious confirmation and tick of approval. Women act on the thoughts of other women, and if they see you with them, they’re intrigued. You’ve already won their attention from across the room. Conversely, if the woman or women you’re out with come across as any other association than just a friend, you’re sending the wrong message and you’re wasting your time. It’s a fine line, but it’s worth the change-up.