Homer Simpson’s Injuries Would Cost A Staggering $200 Million In Real Life

Over the course of 706 episodes, Homer Simpson has endured more than his fair share of injuries. From regular electrocution to falling down cliffs, having the back of his skull bashed in to the odd eye poke… our favourite cartoon patriarch has experienced just about every manner of slapstick physical trauma.

If a study commissioned by the Downtown LA Law Group is anything to go by, his real problems only began once he crossed the threshold of Springfield General Hospital – and that’s before you factor in the dubious treatment of both Dr Hibbert and Dr Nick Riviera. According to the personal injury lawyers, Homer Simpson is estimated to have endured up to US$143million (AU$199.9 million) in medical bills to date. That’s a whole lotta D’Oh. And it also dwarfs the Jackass crew’s $24 million total by sheer comparison.

The team assessed the complete cost of Homer Simpson’s medical bills from over 50 well-documented moments in the show, compiling something they’ve hilariously referred to as a “medical bill rap sheet”, recording every major injury sustained by the notoriously accident-prone character.

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Here, they concluded that the top five most expensive injuries Homer Simpson has sustained include:

1. Brain Damage: US$1,525,500 (AU$2,127,000)
2. Paralysis: US$508,904 (AU$709,570)
3. Radiation Exposure: US$150,000 (AU$209,000)
4. Skull Fracture: US$100,000 (AU$140,000)
5. Loss of Consciousness: US$80,000 (AU$111,000)

The Simpsons are, by design, the quintessential American family. There are 34 towns in the United States called “Springfield” and the fact that show has been running for decades – and even having successfully predicted the future on a number of occasions – is itself a testament to its relatability.

According to another report by the University of Indiana, the average lifetime earnings of individuals with a high school diploma (which includes Homer Simpson along with 88% of the real-life US population, per 2015 Census numbers) is US$900,000 (AU$1,254,879).

Keep in mind, the US doesn’t have a uniform health system or any universal healthcare coverage, and 50 million people – 16% of the US population – lack basic insurance coverage. Then there’s the matter of what the premiums would look like if you were to be struck by lightning.

Lisa better get a scholarship if she wants to hit up college.